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Sgt Frog Abridged - Episode 3R (script)
The following is unedited from the original document except for formatting. Lines may have been rewritten during recording and/or editing. Script Narrator: Today’s episode begins with Keroro and Tamama watching their new TV. *Deadpan* Whoo. Keroro: I’m having so much fun watching my new TV! *Turns to TV showing “my sweet guinea pigs” by Fabienne2212* Tamama: Eh, let’s see what’s on Disney. *Click* Keroro: The what? Tamama: Oh come on, it’s not that ba- okay, yeah it is. Sorry, Sarge. Keroro: *dazed* Yeah… Jalapoly my waffle flabergize, Trix Rabbit…! Tamama: Oh hey, look! It’s an old people commercial! Giroro: I’m not old! Tamama: Haha, it’s the one where they yell at you to get off their lawn. Pichu: Okay, lights in three, two, one, hit it! *Boom, Spotlight on TV* Singing TV: *Operatic* I’m just an old TV, I had to play Disney Chann- *Explodes* *Cuts to the three sitting at the table* Keroro: Eh, the book was better. So, Giroro! What have you been up to? Giroro: I’ve been spying on the humans. Er, Pekoponians. PikPik Carrots, whatever we call them. Keroro: You forgot “Pick-A-Melon”! Tamama: And you forgot “Choose-A-Banana”! *Cuts to the montage* Giroro: I’ve spied on the adult with the cans and the pencil. Then I spied on the boy with the face. I think he was writing a novel or something. *Cuts to Fuyuki* Fuyuki: *Reading off as he writes* And then I said, “waka waka”, but the Napkin Dragon had destroyed the castle. Giroro: *Dramatic* And then I spied on the girl while she was bathing…And then I spied on the girl while she was bathing…And then I spied on the girl while she was bathing… And then I FOUND YOU. What the fuck were you doing?! You were cleaning! Keroro: You just answered your own question. Giroro: Fuck this! I say we take over their house! Keroro: Ohh, great idea! Tamama: Why didn’t you think of that? Keroro: Okay, so here’s the plan. We're going to take a can of soda, and put it on Natsumi's desk. And when she goes to pick it up, we grab it and run out saying "Nyahnyahnyah nyah nyah nyahnyahnyah" and run back to the room. Giroro: … *Intense* Let’s do it. *Immediately cuts to Giroro flying through the window* Keroro: S-…So mission fai- yeah, mission failed. *Attempt 2* Tamama: Why is she shaking the can? Keroro: Oh hell. Duck! *Sound of spraying soda. Giroro flies through window again* *Attempt 3* Keroro: I got the soda! I got the soda- Giroro: You’re supposed to put it on the desk! You just took it from the fridge and ran. Keroro: Oh. *Pause. Giroro flies out window again* *Attempt 4* Keroro: Okay, let’s try that again, but this time we’ll use Dr. Pepper- Giroro: NO! I’m picking the plan this time! Phase 1- We distract the little doofus boy by filling the foyer with crap I stole from the neighbors. *Cuts to Fuyuki seeing the objects* Fuyuki: Hey look! It’s an I don’t give a crap I want it! I love living in a rich neighborhood. *Sees Giroro* Oh wow, another frog! Have I been tested for this?! Keroro: Fuyuki, no! Your religion is a hollow li- *slips on banana* -IIEEEEEEEEE *Hits ground* Giroro: Hey Fuyuki, you wanna see a magic trick? Fuyuki: Yeah! *Fuyuki is suddenly tied up to Keroro* Keroro: I didn’t know I was a volunteer! *Slightly pissed off* I didn’t volunteer. Fuyuki…you’re chaffing my everything… Know any good games to play while you’re tied up-? Fuyuki: *Excited* When does the magic happen?! Giroro: That’s it! Fuyuki: Aw, I wanted to be sawed in half. Giroro: I’ll think about it. Phase 2- We cover the entire house in tripwires and bombs. The little pink-haired backscratcher won’t know what hit her. *Natsumi bursts into the room* Natsumi: Quit fucking around in my room! Tamama: But he’s tied up right no- hehehe, yeah. Giroro: How the hell did you beat bombs with a leek?! Natsumi: *Dramatic* You can diffuse anything when you force a meme! Keroro: *Excited* Really? So if I say one I can get out these ropes? Natsumi: I said “diffuse”. Keroro: Oh… *to himself* It’s over six… *Natsumi hits Giroro and sends him through the window again* Giroro: Maybe it’s all the glass in my head, but Natsumi… I think I love you… No it was the shower-! *Hits trash can* *Cuts to Natsumi’s face* Keroro: So, mission fail- oh, I already know. *Cuts to night time over the campfire* Keroro: So…when’re you gonna buy me a new toothbrush, huh? *Whack, Deadpan* Owie. Narrator: The following day, in darkness… Keroro: How did we get here?! Giroro: You threw me down a hole. Keroro: I saw a bug…down the hole. Tamama: What about me? Keroro: I saw Giroro…down the hole…oh my god! Kululu! Giroro and Tamama: You didn’t turn on the lights! Keroro: Ok, ok. *Turns key, car engine revs, revving rises* Keroro: Okay, here we go- *Revving dies* Keroro: Oh, you gay noodle. *Tries again, key breaks* Keroro: Shit! It broke. Kululu: *Irritated sigh* I’ll do it. *Lights turn on, Kululu appears* Keroro: Oh my god! Kululu! Kululu: *Unamused* Yeah, hi guys. Don’t mind the huge, gaping hole. I’m still doing construction. Tamama: He sounds like a parakeet. *Keroro hits Kululu on head with newspaper* Keroro: Bad bird! You need to use the outhouse like a regular cat does! *Silence for a few seconds* Keroro: So, we need you to make a base. Kululu: Uh, I already did. Keroro: Oh, wow! You’re like that magic man with the magic… Who was it, Shaq? *Another pause* Keroro: Heheh, I just wasted your time with that. *Credits* Narrator: *Exciting* Next time on Sgt Frog Abridged! Dororo: I’m not in the team. *Later* Dororo: I’m in the team. Category:Episode Scripts